That’s NOT what I expected!

This is what I often hear from my little guy who loves routine.  Having Asperger’s Syndrome can be a lot to handle sometimes.  Routine or familiarity can make a world of difference in the day to day – one less thing to stress about while dealing with all the other input the world is throwing at you. 

When he was little and life was changing so fast, we heard this phrase often.  There were tantrums over the wrong peanut butter or an apple being cut up instead of whole.  Never mind EVER having a babysitter or driving a different way home from the mall – that would be traumatizing! 

It did get better.  When he could read, we made up social stories, walking through what to expect and if that didn’t happen, what was next.  And humour helped.  Helping him see how ridiculous it was to stress over whether he had an apple or a plum in his lunch when I was going to give him a pineapple instead.  Thank God for his great sense of humour!

What’s helped the most is having a strong foundation, a footing that let him safely take on the outside world.  For our DS it was a trust in his parents and more often now, trust in himself to be able to handle the unexpected.  We break it down and often say such things as “One of the great talents of our family is our amazing problem solving ability.”  or “This sounds like a job for Super-Kid!”  With this, he is getting better at how to deal with the unexpected – most days.

The funny thing is how much we say “That’s NOT what I expected!” to each other now.  “What?!  We’re out of coffee?! That’s not what I was expecting!!!”  It puts it all in perspective.   I think most people can handle the good, bad and ugly in life much better when they know what to expect.  We just do it more automatically than some people with learning challenges. 

WW - Bridgehead made my day

On the weekend I felt worse than if I had swallowed glass. However, being supermom, I took DD to a birthday party at Gotta Paint (awesome place!) and I killed the time with a Westboro wander. I wheezed my way to Bridgehead and indulged in a yummy carrot cake and coffee. It was a miracle cure. I enjoyed the rest of my wander being easily amused by the hydrant art and all the Westboro wonders. Not such a dreadful day after all.

Clearly losing it

Today I have cleaned the house so that the beloved cleaning company can find the surfaces to really clean. I have sorted through piles of clothing without my daughter near by so that I can pass on some outgrown clothes to her younger cousin without a big fight. I have driven to Kanata to meet my sister to drop off said clothes and borrow gear for a Halloween costume for my son. I have bought more Halloween crap for myself that I probably didn't need. I have picked up the kids, made them to homework while I whipped up more costume stuff for my boy. I am now attempting to blog while the pizzas cook and we get ready to head out to MYC music class with the kid who didn't practice.

Normal? Well usually. Except I have NO voice and a wicked cough type cold. I should be curled up in bed having the world cater to me. Yet here I am, being super-mom yet again. Where is my sanity? Clearly I lost it amid the clutter.

WW - Discovering the new webcam

I really am easily amused.

Wheels spinning yet again

Clock goes off at 5:00am. Ugh! Hubby is on his way to the airport again. Tough for him and tough for me. It's a short work trip this time but it still involves adjustments. Making mental notes to myself - get the mail, arrange play date for Laura tonight while Owen does music, buy more coffee, wipe breakfast off faces and check bags for what is forgotten.

After the daily kid drop and home trip I have a moment of inspiration. Make pumpkin cookies! By the time the dough is made I'm back to spinning my wheels again. The to-do list is SO long that I don't know where to begin. I've managed to put up my own self-defeating barricade again. When in doubt, do nothing. Must play useless games on the computer. Well that's helpful. Strangely the dishes did not do themselves while I aimed for a high score.

Where do some people get all the energy? I seem to have missed out on that gene. Never mind. Must move forward, even if it is slow. Step one, pour more coffee...

WW Thanksgiving AND Kids in the Capital

First of all, the very nice people at Kids In the Capital let me make a guest post. Obviously I wrote it when my girl was a sicky and illness was much on my mind. We are now recovered (except my husband who seems to have a Man Cold) but I hope my little handy hints are of some help to those in the thick of it.

Kids in the Capital is going for a Canadian Blog Award. If you like it, why not vote for it by clicking and voting for them. Thanks!

Now on to Thanksgiving. Gorgeous weekend here in Ottawa. We ate two full turkey dinners, spendt hours outdoors hiking & hay riding and saw everyone we are related to. So here are the kid-pics to prove it.

Knowing Me Knowing You - October

Yay!  A happy little post care of Fairy Blogmother so that I can write something logical with the help of some direction.  So here’s me on the questions of the month. 

1. Started your Christmas shopping yet?

Now really.  What fun is Christmas shopping before the crowded panic of the week before Christmas?  I find it hard to think out of season and if there ain’t snow, I don’t got the spirit.  Ask me again on December 23rd.

2. Fall is here, what is your favourite cold weather comfort food?
I LOVE fall.  I feel somewhat justified at eating anything and everything that smells good.  Pumpkin anything, apple anything (especially with cinnamon), roasted anything (except lamb – I just can’t do it, what with their cute little woolly faces and all) and chocolate.  Well I can do chocolate any time of year – I’m that versatile.  A good red wine will do nicely too.  I wonder why I keep putting on the pounds?  A mystery.

3. Are you watching any new TV shows?

Too much TV.  September is good for doing that and my DH has been away so I have been glued to the boob-tube far too much.  There’s new seasons of Glee, Grey’s, Modern Family, Amazing Race and Big Bang to get into.  I’m also trying No Ordinary Family and various cooking shows. It’s a wonder I have time to parent the kids. 

4. Have you read Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follet?

No, I haven’t.  (See above – too much TV watching to spend quality time reading or something.)  Although I have a nice big pile of books bedside that I am aiming to get through.  It may happen by spring thaw.

5. Is the top of your desk cluttered or clear?
Um, well, did I mention that my DH is away ?  He’s the organizer.  I like to think of myself as the free-flowing creative one… or the one who is easily distracted and doesn’t quite get everything back to where it belongs.  It’s not as bad as it sometimes is.  I’ll put it on my To Do list…. if I can find where I put it….

So, that’s me.  How ‘bout you?  Any little fun answers to the above you would care to share?  Comment below and/or link up with Shannon’s Mr. Linky thingy and type away.

Cheers!

There Are Heroes Among Us

Do you know any? I do.  The more I think about it, the more I know. 

The handy dandy Dictionary.com defines a hero as “A man of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities.”  That doesn’t quite cut it, in my opinion.  Not only is that rather sexist (shesh!) and classist (“noble” indeed!) but it fails to cover the purpose of these heroic deeds.

I think the definition of a hero should includes a person who goes above and beyond the call of duty to help others, often at the expense of the well being of their own life.  There is an element of self sacrifice involved.  Whether it be taking the time or risking one’s own life, the hero goes out of her or his way to make the lives of others better.  It is not about some distinguished ability in the eyes of others, but rather using one’s abilities to maximize the benefit. 

I have a neighbour who I admire more and more as I get to know her.  A.’s life has not been easy.  She is from Vietnam and moved here a couple of decades ago with her family as a teenager.  There were years of much struggle including helping family get out of jail in her home country, dealing with family alcoholism, family estrangement and much more.  But she pulled it all back together. Heroic.  She even stood up to an armed robber while helping at a family store, telling him he could not have the money because it was not hers to give.  She talked to this man and told him that this was no way to lead a life, that he was young and free and he should make something of himself.  I believe she changed a life that day.  Heroic.  She donated a kidney to her mother – a woman she had been estranged with previously, simply because she could help.  Heroic.  She raises three beautiful and caring kids with love, respect and support for their dreams.  Heroic. 

I am lucky to have this neighbour.  She enriches my life, just as the other heroes I know do too.  Taking some time to appreciate the heroes in our lives makes a difference.  Whether it is those who serve their country in peacekeeping or those who serve their community with their time.  There are heroes in our families too, taking time and energy to help beyond their own daily struggles.  I am grateful.  I am encouraged.

I guess I got a little warm and fuzzy with this post today. (Too many chick flicks? Not enough sleep?  I’m posting anyway.  It’s not like anyone reads this anyway. :-p )  Oh well.  Hug your hero today!